Sunday, 1 January 2017

Why Moving Abroad Is Hard

Me and my dad in Ystad last summer.

First of all, happy New Year to everyone. I'm not writing the classic "New Year New Me" post and I think there are enough out there for you to read anyway. So instead I will share another episode out of my moving abroad life with you.

Until now, all I shared about moving abroad online and to any friends and family were positive feelings. But of course there are also a lot of negatives that come along with it and I do experience them too. Like I said before in a recent blog post, I am not usually one to get homesick. When I moved to France the first time in 2011, I did feel quite alone and miserable, which was however more due to the fact that I didn't have any friends at the beginning and it was hard to settle in.

This was totally different when I lived abroad later in my life as I always had a lot of new friends and a safe social life so instead of feeling homesick, I felt incredibly sad to leave this life behind when it was time to go back to my family home. Of course, this time it is completely different, as I am basically emigrating to another country and not only staying away for one or two semesters.

Maybe that's why I also felt so sad the day I was leaving my family. I even was scared a little bit and asked myself if I am doing the right thing. After all, this whole thing has not been carefully planned but instead has been more of a spur-of-the-moment decision of mine. So maybe I made a mistake? I don't know, but I will find out over the next few months for sure.

This picture is 6 years old which is obvious when you look at mine and my sister's eyebrows.

The reason why I write this post however, is my father. My dad has always had the biggest problem with me leaving. He likes to have his children close because family is the most important thing. And of course I saw how hard it was for him to keep himself together these last few days before I left as he didn't want to make me feel bad. And I know it wasn't easy for him.

I left very very early on Thursday morning and my dad drove me to the station. When I was on the train and saw him through the window how he was standing lost on the platform, my heart felt suddenly very tight. Then, as he was walking down the stairs, I saw his face crumble and he was crying. The thought of it now turns me into a weeping mess. And also then I started crying as well because I just felt so awful and horrible and basically like the worst person in the world.

How could I do this to my dad, to my family? This is really the hardest part for me of moving abroad. Not because leaving might be difficult for me, but because I know that with my decision to go I broke his heart. And I do hate myself a little bit for it. But on the other hand, I know I have to do what is right for me. And at the moment I think that is moving to Ireland. I just hope, it will get easier for my dad with time.

Maybe I also have to add that I think this has been the first time that I saw him crying.

Have you moved to a different country as well and what did you find especially hard, emotionally?


Saturday, 24 December 2016

Merry Christmas!

It's the morning of Christmas Eve and for me that's the most special day of Christmas. In Germany, we celebrate Christmas Eve and we give presents on that evening too. I always liked that tradition because it is so cosy and festive to sit in the bright-lit house when it's dark outside and unwrap the presents. This morning, we will decorate the Christmas tree which is always a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to it every year.

We are celebrating small every year as we are seeing the most part of our family on the 25th. But it's nice anyway and we're going to cook a lovely vegan stew for dinner and I can't wait to eat it and sing all the carols afterwards. We always sing before the gift giving and I really like it a lot.

This is going to be a short post. I basically just wanted to wish you all a merry Christmas and hope you all have a few wonderful days with your families and friends. And if you don't celebrate Christmas, I hope you get a bit of the festive feel anyway and make the most of the last few days of the year.

I'm not sure how many posts I will be able to put up in the next few weeks as I'm moving to a different country and need to find a place to live there asap. I'll also start my new job and while it's all very exciting, it will probably not leave me much time for blogging. I hope you understand.

But I try and be back as soon as I can and share all my new Ireland adventures with you. Until then, happy holidays and, if I don't post again, a happy new year!


Wednesday, 21 December 2016

2016 Recap | What I Learned

2016 is nearly over, with only ten more days left until we say hello to the new year. I don't think I feel particularly sorry to say goodbye to this year, with all the shit that has happened in the world. Personally however, I think it was a quite good year for me.

Yeah, put a drunk picture first because that's what uni is about, right? :D

Let's start with university. At the beginning of the year I decided on my bachelor thesis topic and I still think it was a good one for me, even though I failed it and am still in the process of working on it so I can hand it in again on the 31st of December. But in the end I finished uni, even though I'm technically not finished yet, but let's ignore that fact. Uni is over and done and I don't think I will continue studying again. That's definitely something I realised this year. I think I always had this picture of me in my head how I thought I was or should be and I totally forgot to see myself clearly. I'm not a student and I don't think I'll ever be. So I'm glad I finally realised this and closed this chapter of my life.

Socially it was a good year too. I spent a lot of time with my friends and met a lot of new people. Some of them I will probably not see again and others I (hopefully) will. I always thought it's horrible when you meet people you like and don't manage to keep in touch. But actually it's not that bad. Sometimes those are just people that were perfect companions for that specific time and it just doesn't work out on the long term. And that's okay.

I also went to quite a few gigs this year. In January, I saw The Tallest Man on Earth live in Malmö. In February, it was Hozier in Copenhagen, and in May I saw Mumford & Sons, also in Copenhagen. While I enjoyed all of these concerts very much (especially Hozier and Mumford & Sons), the most epic one was Coldplay in Berlin. It was just such a big concert and such a cool experience. I'm really glad I had the possibility to see so many great bands and musicians this year and I hope I can keep it up next year too.

My consciousness has changed a lot this year as well. After being a vegetarian for many years, I finally made the switch to vegan in January. I am still happy with this decision and I can't see myself going back to vegetarian again. I also reconsidered my fashion choices after watching The True Cost documentary in spring. Since then I decided for myself to not support unethical fashion brands anymore and I have created an Ethical Clothing page that gets longer and longer every week as I add new brands. I'm very happy with that list and hope it's an inspiration to as many people as possible.

The most important thing that has happened this year though is something that only takes place now. It's the fact that I'm moving abroad again and this time (hopefully) permanently. I am beyond excited to move to Ireland next week and I'm looking forward to this new chapter in my life. I think it is something that always ment to happen. After all these years staying in different countries and dreaming of a life somewhere else, it feels only right that I'm leaving now. It's as if finally two pieces of a puzzle fit together and form a new picture. Maybe I should have done that earlier but then I also know that there probably hasn't been a time that has been more perfect than now.

So personally this has been a good year for me. With things coming to and end and new beginnings, with beautiful holidays and a lot of fun. I feel like I realised so much about myself and the life I want to lead and I'm happy for that. I'm excited for 2017 and I don't even care that I turn 29 (!) in March. At the end of the day age is just a number, right? :D

How has your year 2016 been? Did you make great and useful experiences or are you happy that it's over?


Monday, 19 December 2016

My Four Favourite Christmas Songs

It's about time that I'm giving you a Christmas themed post. I haven't been very present on my blog this month, which is mainly due to the fact that there is a lot going on in my life right now and I'm not really the best at multitasking.

But today I'll chat with you about my favourite Christmas songs. I wanted to do a catchy three, but I couldn't decide so I ended up going with four. As you might know if you read my blog for a while, I love music a lot. It's a big part of my life and I'm basically always listening to it. If you'd ever meet me out and about, I'd most certainly have my headphones in and would be listening to my favourite tunes.

So it's only natural that I get a bit overexcited around Christmas time when the festive songs are on again and I can run around the house, singing from the top of my lungs. Well, now you'll find out which songs are the ones I'm always waiting for.

"Merry Christmas Everyone" by Shakin' Stevens
I'll be honest with you, I can't actually think of another song by Shakin' Stevens. Maybe my mind has gone blank or I just really don't listen to him at all when it's not Christmas. But "Merry Christmas Everyone" is by far my favourite Christmas song and I always forget it is! Just this morning, when I was in the bathroom, they played the song on the radio. It started right after I turned the radio on, which I think feels a lot like fate. I love the happy and festive feel about it and it's perfect to sing along. It's just the best.

"Last Christmas" by Wham!
I always thought this one was my all-time favourite Christmas song but I actually realised that the one mentioned above is slightly ahead. Nevertheless, I love "Last Christmas". I know there are a lot of people that are dreading the time when radio stations are beginning to play it again, but I can never get enought of it. It's catchy, it's easy to sing along and it just represents Christmas like no other song out there.

"Driving Home For Christmas" by Chris Rea
Chris Rea is great anyway but this is definitely my favourite song by him. It's the most melodious one out of the Christmas songs and I love the feeling it represents. Because who doesn't love driving home for Christmas? It's just the best feeling, when you know you'll be home soon with your family and can indulge in all the festiveness. Also his voice is just so beautiful and soothing. Ahh, I could listen to that song forever.

"Happy Xmas (War Is Over)" by John Lennon
This song has a little bit of a chanting feel for me, with all the different voices. I'm a massive Beatles fan and of course I love John Lennon as well. He has one of the most recognisable voices for me. I love the peaceful message of it, as it's something we should remember all year round and not just on Christmas. When I hear the beginning of the song, I just instantly feel so festive and happy.

I also just found out the other day that both, Shakin' Stevens and Chris Rea are sharing their birthdays with me. Isn't that a sign or what?! Two of my favourite Christmas songs are written by people that have the same birthday! I think that's amazing, even though probably no one else will think it is, lol.

What is your favourite Christmas song?


PS: Ok, I know I've done basically the same post last year but I streamlined the list a bit and I felt like I needed to do an update because I just needed to tell you that my favourite Christmas song is actually a different one than the one I always thought it is. But in the end, it probably just is the same jabbering again. ;)